Hello Blogger Friends!

I haven't posted in a really long time, I just needed a break from all things TTC.

So happy to announce that we are now back on the TTC wagon, and using OPK's this time!

DH is fully healed and life is good!

We recently got our first puppy he is such a sweet boy and we hope to give him a little brother or sister soon!

Our baby niece was born in October and is a spitting image of her daddy!

We are excited about the holidays and spending it with our loved ones in our new home!

Hope all of my blogging buddies are well!

I'm such a loser :)

This weekend is tax free weekend in VA, I'm so excited I could burst! I am a teacher and cannot wait to get my school supplies for the new year! Ahhh...I'm such a loser :)

And this wouldn't be my blog if I didn't complain so let me just say AF sucks!

It's been a while...

It's been a while since I posted and I'm feeling kinda down so I figured I could get it all out on here.

We have had some family drama, which I am over and don't even want to think about.  I did nothing wrong and I'm NOT going to apologize for something I didn't do.  

School is out, but I am taking classes and they are really kicking my butt.  I cannot wait for July 14th!  

On a lighter note my BFF is expecting, I was really hoping we could go through this together, but its not looking like that is going to happen as I started spotting today :(  Of course it could happen in the near future, but who knows.  My sister-in-laws, sister-in-law is also expecting.  And while I am happy for both my friends, I break a little every time one of my friends gets pregnant and I'm still not.  

I want to have tests done to find out if there is a reason it hasn't happened for us, but that would just be bad too.  If they find something wrong our insurance will not pay for treatment.  I feel so lost in this process right now.  And on top of all of that my cycles keep getting longer :(  I need to have a good cry, but I don't have time too...

I just need some good news something to lift my spirits a bit...

Updates

It's been a super long time since I wrote so I thought I would post a few updates.

DH is doing much better, although he got sunburned this weekend. He just went to the doctor and he has to have a minor surgery to remove a splinter that is still in his leg next week.

I am now working full time at the HS, but just until the end of the year. At least that is all for now, I'm still holding out hope that I will be able to go full time next year. School gets out next Thursday, my last day is Friday, and I can't wait. I am also taking some education courses right now too, so that is a lot of work as well.

I ordered a new computer this weekend; and got an e-mail today saying that Apple just released a new MacBook Pro and that I will be getting it instead of the old one and that the price is less! Which totally rocks!

We are now back on the TTC wagon, and with DH being home all the time, I am really really hoping we will be able to make this happen finally!!

I think that is all for now, I hope everyone has a great week!

My husband's accident

A lot of you have been sending me messages and comments about DH's accident. I'm posting a blog instead of responding to everyone individually.

Sunday morning about 11:30 DH was at the fire stataion working on the competition tower. He fell from the top of the tower, about 30 feet. He was able to hold on for about 10-15 feet and free fell 15 feet. He has lots of scrapes and bruises, a broken left femur and a broke right foot.

He had emergency surgery Sunday afternoon to repair the femur he now has a metal rod from his knee to his hip and 4 screws. He was discharged from the hospital on Wednesday afternoon. We are home now, thank goodness, and he is comfortable for the most part. The pain has been manageable to this point.

A physical therapist is coming to the house to work with him and I work with him throuhgout the day as well. He has a follow up appointment with his surgeon on Monday. Thanks to everyone who checked in and prayed for us during this trying time.

Nephew's can make anything better!!

I got to spend the whole day with my nephew today! He is such a great little guy. We cooked breakfast together, that kid makes some mean scrambled eggs! Then we baked cookies.

Then we played Wii and the boardgame version of LIFE, he loved it we played 3 times!

Then I took him to McDonald's for lunch.

That kid was so hyped up on sugar when he left, I will be lucky if his momma doesn't bring him back to me tonight.

It was just so nice being able to spend time with him, I don't get to see him often and it was such a wonderful day! (Way better than yesterday)

What a freakin' day!!

Ughh! I wake up with blood pouring out of my nose this morning.

Then I go to work at the grocery store, 15 minutes before I get off, this chick comes us and says I'm gonna see if this card will work I had to cancel it, it says declined, so she goes to her car to get money. She doesn't have enough so she brings me her cigarettes. I think she wants me to take them off so she can get her food, so I take them off and give her her new total. Oh NO she wanted the cigs. The guy behind her in line told her she needed to decide what she was going to buy, and said something about people being rude, this was in the express line mind you. So she looks at me says here take a f*ing tip B**** and throws the money at me $1.20 more than what she owes.

Then I get home, expecting to be able to do laundry, we just got our washer and dryer today, I have not done laundry in 2 weeks. I get home, I can't get it to plug in. The dryer doesn't even have a plug and they didn't put a dryer vent in when they built the house!

Needless to say I have not had a good day, and on top of all the AF showed yesterday. I just want to cry, and I needed to get all of that out!

Sorry for the long vent!

No Souvenir for us...

...I was really hoping to take a little souvenir with us from the old house, but my body and AF seem to have other plans. I had some spotting yesterday and a MAJOR temp drop this morning :(

I'm a little sad because we are going to be trying less hard for a while.

In other news its SPRING BREAK!!!!!

And my nephew is coming to spend the whole day with me Tuesday! I'm very excited! I haven't seen him in over a month.

I guess that is all for now. I will post Tuesday night about our day!

Ouch!

I just got home from the dr. and I sprained my foot, and tore ligaments. He ordered anti-inflamatory drugs and staying off it "aka crutches" for 3-4 days. But if not better by then to continue the crutches and come back.

Exicting times!

I haven't posted in a while, because we moved!! Finally they finished our house and we moved in last Sunday, as I'm sure you can imagine it has been crazy since then. Unpacking is a major pain.

On the TTC front we are taking a less active approach for a while until we see exactly where the house is going to leave us financially. We are still trying, just not as hard. I'm also hoping and praying that I go full time next year so we can really focus on having a baby.

My SIL is now 11 weeks and won't speak to me. If anything I should be the one not talking to her, but oh well. We went to dinner with Dh's dad and brother and SIL and she wouldn't even speak to me the entire time, and she sat right next to me!

Then my other SIL is now trying to have another child. I wonder what people think sometimes.

I feel like we are the only ones being responsible about this, we got the house first then we will have the baby, I mean had we gotten pg a long time ago it would have been different circumstances don't get me wrong, but at this point...

Work is going pretty good right now, and spring break is next week!! I CAN'T WAIT! and neither can the kids. It will be a much needed break for everyone.

AF and other happenings

AF showed this morning, I had a teeny tiny bit of spotting Friday and Saturday and when I woke up this morning she was here. I'm ok with it I guess, we are getting ready to move and I guess it will be good that I'm not PG, so I can help carry boxes and what not.

Here's to hoping that a new home will mean a new member to the family!

I think I'm going to put off testing until atleast the summer. Since my insurance won't cover any treatment, what is the rush.

In other news, I got a new toy for work today that I am super excited about! Its a remote control for my computer. Now I will be able to lecture from anywhere in my classroom! I'm so excited to go try it out tomorrow!

I hope everyone has a great week!

Feeling my dream slipping away...

So I finally did it 3 cycles later. I called my insurance company to find out about fertility coverage. This is cycle 16/17 month 15 off BCP, cycle 8 charting, and no luck yet.

Back in October when I went for my yearly my NP told me to wait 3 more cycles and then she would start running some baseline tests. Well we reached that point and said oh we will give it just one more. I am now at 3 more. So I called, the good news, they will cover all diagnostic testing.

And the bad news they cover NO treatments if something is found to be wrong. So I just had a little tear fest, and I'm off to get my nephews b-day present and something really fattening!

I'm going to discuss all of this with DH tonight, and we will make a plan from there. I will update when we have a decision.

Happy Birthday to me!

Happy Birthday to me!

I'm 23 today...

Reality Check

I feel like a total crazy person. My BIL called this week to let us know that they are expecting. This kinda took me by surprise, and my feelings were really hurt.

When we started trying DH told him, and I feel like they should have told us becuase we started trying over a year ago. Some people may disagree that they should have told us, but its my personal feeling. And I am thankful that they told us in private.

I cried for about three days, and I'm still upset. They are living in a one room garage apartment and now will have to finish building their house in 9 months.

I was fussing because they went sking last weekend and I know that it won't hurt anything, but I felt like it was pretty irresponsible. It was one of those, you have something that I want so badly and you aren't even being responsible about it, moments. Well when I said something to DH he told me that I took that stuff too far.

Well me being the menstural mess that I was got even more upset. But after I thought about it I felt like a crazy person. I'm trying to regroup and deal with this situation.

I'm super stressed because of work, and getting the house finished, and this news just came at a bad time. I will be 23 tomorrow and I really wanted to be pregnant by now.

As DH keeps telling me it will happen when it is supposed to and that I just need to relax, but its hard to see negative after negative each month.

Bummed

Looks like AF has arrived, no warning, just BAM! There she was. I'm sad :(

So I tested this morning...surprise, surprise, BFN :(
I knew it would be, but I'm on CD 27 and no sign of AF yet. I didn't temp this cycle so I really don't know when I o'd. The longest cycle I have had in 6 months was 29 days, so I guess if she doesn't show I will test again in a few days.

I'm still kinda bummed though.

Breakdown

I just had a total emotional breakdown, I spilled a glass of water and I had to move a photo album that has pictures of my grandma in it. So after I cleaned up the mess, I opened the book. As soon as I saw the first picture I just started bawling, I cried for a good 20 minutes. Its the first time I have had a break down like that in a while. I guess its probably good for me though, to let it all out everynow and again.

Amazing Day!!!

Today was a totally amazing day!

I got my feedback from my AP from her walkthrough. It was all positive! She even hand wrote a little note telling me how great the activity I was doing was, and that it was well planned! She signed it and put a smiley face star on it! I was through the roof excited!

We also made an offer on a house and they accepted! We ARE finally going to be homeowners!

God is great and he has given me an amazing day!!

Updates!

I haven't updated in a while so here goes.

TTC: I'm on CD 24, I would ecpext AF in the next few days. I think I o'd around cd 12, but no way to tell for sure, because I'm not temping. I have had an upset stomach all day, not sure what to think of that.

Job: Its going much better, my AP came in last week and again this week. She put the paper from today in my box after I left so I don't know what she had to say. She has not met with me about the over an hour observation she made last week.

Life: DH is great, I made a hint about something that I thought would be super romantic last night and he did it! It was great! Also we are putting a contract on a house tomorrow!! I'm so excited I could scream! Its brand new the floors are not even in yet so we will get to pick them out and everything!

I think that is all for now, I will update again tomorrow when I have more details!

It feels good!

I'm pretty sure I o'd either Wednesday or Thursday, but I don't know because I'm not temping. But you know it feels really good! I'm not stressing over what my temp is going to be tomorrow, or what that little twinge was, although I know it would be too early for that anyway.

It feels so good to have a break from it all, I still go in GP and I'm still entering cm & "symptoms" on FF. I don't know what CD I am on from day to day. I just look at my ticker and it said CD 15 and I just thought WOW I could be getting AF in 10 more days if this cycle is anything like last cycle.

I think I'm going to try to hold out until Feb. 7th if AF doesn't show, to test. But who knows I might test earlier. I'm just enjoying these next few weeks.

Things are going so much better at school now, I have all of my lesson plans done through Feb. 5th! Now all I have to worry about is having a job next year since they are talking about all of these budget cuts.

Whatever is supposed to happen will I'm a firm believer in that.

I'm still working on the whole losing weight thing, I forgot to weigh in today so I will do it tomorrow. I need to go work out...

Little Red Nighty

So I bought a red nighty last Valentine's Day, but didn't wear it, because I really wasn't happy with the way my body looked. To be quite honest I'm still not happy. I have jumped back on the Wii Fit wagon and I am going to try my hardest to be back in shape and comfortable enough with my body to wear it this year for V-Day.

Now all I need is DH to go get the excercise bike that his Grandma gave me and I will be in good shape. I can do this in less than a month right?!?

I guess the good comes with the bad

We went and looked at the house and really liked it. Check.

We went to the bank and got pre-approved for a mortgage. Check.

We call DH's dad about the inheritance money that we need to be able to buy the house. Where is the check??

He has DH's money in a CD that he can only access a few times a year. He THINKS it will be avaliable next month, but doesn't know for sure. He won't be back in town until Tuesday. I am so annoyed. Its not his money so he should have it somewhere that we can get it when we need it.

We also found out that someone else is looking at the house.

I always let myself get excited about things like this and then something always happens and it doesn't work out. I just need to stop getting my hopes up. But when it is something that would better me I can't help but get excited.

Here's to hoping the CD does come avaliable next month and we can get the process rolling.

On a positive note I was supposed to get an informal evaluation by my AP by the 15th and she never came. I was on pins and needles all week, but she never came, I guess she will do it in 2 weeks when we go back to actually teaching!

My New Obsession!

I think blogging has become my new obsession. I'm not temping this month so I have no chart to look at. I just want to write my feelings down all the time.

We went to look at the house last night, and I think we are going to go to the bank tomorrow! We love the location and its a nice neighborhood. I'm not in love with the floor plan, but we won't be there forever. It will be just perfect for us for now!

I will be really gald when this week is over. I have been trying to get ready for exams next week and it is just a lot of work. I will be glad when its all over!

Exciting News!

A class I need to take was cancelled at the local community college, but I found the same class at a community college about 45 minutes from us, but it is online!!

We are also going to look at a house sometime this week, my cousin is a realtor and he is going to show it to us! We saw pics of it online and we drove by yesterday to see what we thought, it looks ok from the outside so now I can't wait to see the inside! We might actually finally be homeowners!!

AF arrived Saturday, but I'm trying to stay positive. We are taking the month off of charting and just seeing what happens. I know the basic time frame of when I O and I'm hoping that if we just have sex when we want to it will happen. If not then I will call my NP and we will start the testing process after this cycle. So either way it will work out, either I will be pg or we will get answers. My amazing BFPB Kismet, told me some things that I need to ask my insurance company if they will cover, so I will at least know financially what I am getting into.

I'm about half way through my first book of the book challenge and looking forward to all of the reading I will be doing this year!

She's coming...

I have been spotting for the last two days, and I had a pretty significant temp drop this morning. But thats it no cramps, nothing yet. So now I sit and wait. FF can't decide if I O'd on CD 12 or 15, it has changed my O day the last 3 days.

I had to get that out. That is all for now.

New Year

Happy 2009!

I am so thankful that 2008 is over, I can honestly say it was the worst year of my life so far.

I'm looking forward to 2009 with fresh eyes.

I'm not making any resolutions this year I'm making goals. Here are a few that I have come up with so far:
1. I joined the Nest Book Club, 25 Books in 2009 challenge. I really think I can achieve this one.
2. Attain a full time teaching position within my school system, I'm only part time now.
3. If I don't get a BFP this cycle, I want to tell our families that we have been trying and that we are moving on to the testing phase, I know we will need their support through the process.
4. Figure out why I have not gotten a BFP yet.
5. If I don't get a BFP soon I want to get back in shape and be happy with my body again.
6. Purchase our own home, this will probably only happen if I get a full time position.
7. Blog more often.

These are the goals that I have set for myself so far. I'm sure I will add to them later.

Updates

On the job front: my principal came in and observed my class, it went great! He was supposed to discuss it with me but that was a month before we got out for Christmas and I still have not talked to him about it, so I must not have screwed up but so bad. I will have an informal observation when we go back with my AP again. Sometime before the 15th. I have a lot to get done between now and then too, self-evaluation, mid-term exam and all of that. I'm ready though and can't wait to show her what I am really made of!

On the family front: DH and I have had some great conversations lately, we are so ready for a baby, we are just waiting on God to decide the same thing. My SIL's pregnancy turned out to be tubular and she had to have the fetus and her tube removed. She totally ruined Christmas because we will not allow her abusive bf in our home. So because she wouldn't come, MIL or Grand-MIL wouldn't come to Christmas either, it killed me to see DH so hurt. Two days later they all came over like nothing had ever happened. I'm still mad, but I will get over it eventually I guess.

On the TTC front: we are now on cycle 15, month 13 and cycle 6 charting. This is the last month of have good timing or call the NP so we can start running some baseline tests to see what is going on. I still have not confirmed O so I'm hoping to do that soon, in about 2 weeks I will be making a call. Either to say I'm KU or I need to schedule an appointment to discuss our next steps. I am praying that it will be the first reason, but also trying to prepare myself if its the latter. DH has been so great the last 3 cycles with being tough and getting business done when it needs to be done, although I think it is starting to wear on him a bit. He's been a trooper!